Published:
July 2021

Issue:
Vol.16, No.1

This works are published in JoCAT and are licensed under a CC BY-NC-ND-4.0 license.

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Sense of Self

The selection of eleven works on the cover of this edition, volume 17, number 1, were chosen for their complementarity, diversity and graphic qualities, from the 37 submissions received. The accompanying ‘portrait gallery’ showcased an exploration into a ‘sense of self ’ in a variety of media and styles by creative arts therapists from many lands.

a minimalist scribble [1]

(a found poem assembled from eleven fragments) [2]

it was further down than I could have ever envisaged [3]

a confrontational reassessment of distorted views [4]

replicated at different angles [5]

life through a different lens [6]

where wondering rather than knowing can unfold [7]

oddly strong and free [8]

beyond the relegated, rich subject matter of a white imaginary [9]

the shape of things to come [10]

see via my eyes, feel with my skin [11]

the bridge that connects us all [12]

Kirthana Selvaraj, Decolonise me, 2020, oil on canvas, 762×508mm.

This self-portrait emerged out of a critical need to see myself beyond the relegated, rich subject matter of a white imaginary. It was a response to my lived experiences of navigating heteronormative and white supremacist institutions, acting as an illustration, elicitation, and artefact. There is also the truth of my defiance, as I author my own body, I position myself in this painting with a descending gaze, claiming whatever power I can within these spaces. Subverting Eurocentric depictions of bodies like mine in science and art, I embody ideas of radical self-care and decolonisation of my own body, I aim to show that identities of being a Queer South Asian Femme, are ongoing processes perforated with relentless negotiation and renegotiation within systems of power.

Ronald P.M.H. Lay, Self-portrait: Reflections of distorted views, 2019, digital photograph.

On a psychological level, my work is about meaning, memory, the passing of time and the search for Self. Without a doubt, I am influenced by experiences and from those I come in contact with, both personally and professionally. All of this is interwoven into my creative expression and is evidenced in the multi-layered techniques that I apply; increasingly, my artwork is tending to be constructive and conceptual. Framing certain areas in the art manipulates the viewer’s attention and the images themselves. The viewer is encouraged to look beyond the obvious, to briefly consider the title of the piece, and to reflect on their own experiences...after all, art is also about the inter-relationship(s) between itself and the viewer. The self-portrait presented here is just one in a life-long series, and is a confrontational reassessment of distorted views – metaphorically suggested by the reflective mirroring object.

Xiang Li, Self-portrait Made in China, 2021, ink on watercolour paper, 240×320mm.

I was born in Southern China in the early 1980s and I have lived in Australia for over 12 years. I call Australia home. The time I have spent in Australia has changed my culture and my vision of the world. But it won’t change my identity as a Chinese person. There is a perception that ‘Made in China’ means mass-produced and low quality. This self-portrait is trying to communicate that China is not just a symbol – that it could be someone like me, a real person. I was ‘Made in China’ but I am ‘recyclable’ in Australia.
I have registered as an organ donor. When I am no longer in this world, I will be recycled in Australia. Someone will see via my eyes, feel with my skin, love someone with my heart, and urinate with my kidneys. The work reflects my self-identity and my view of living and death.

Jennifer Knoll, scattereD seNse of Self, 2017, digital photograph.

Through the prism, we can see ourselves replicated at different angles, in different representations. This image was taken during an inquiry into compassion fatigue articulating the scattered sense of self.

Michaela Psaila-Savona, Genetic pool, 2019, textiles, stitch, buttons, paper, 1000×750mm.

My family has been challenged by battles with various types of cancers, some of which have been won and some sadly, lost. Our genetic pool has given us strength to overcome what at times seems insurmountable. Through creative arts therapies, I explored the beauty within each cancer cell, which encouraged me to look deeper within myself. The fears of potential illness were explored, contained, and reframed. I now see my cancer as a gift, as it allowed me to view the beauty of life through a different lens.

Emma van Daal, Conversations with Kate, 2020, Aquarelle graphite, 210×297mm.

This portrait comes from the graphic novel chapter of my Professional Doctorate in Therapeutic Arts Practice (2021) where I used an art-making-as-inquiry process to explore the immanence of voice in relation to the lived experiencing of anorexia. ‘Kate’ was created to present ‘how’ the voices that emerged from the research were sensed, perceived, and embodied, and how the aliveness of their confluence contributed to (my) becoming. Whilst not in view, the closeness of this portrait immediately suggests connections to people, places, and objects that open a relational space between the viewer and the subject where wondering rather than knowing can unfold.

Rosa Monina Jueco, Lady on the wall, 2018-2021, mixed media, 305mm×450mm.

Lady on the Wall started as a minimalist scribble three years ago. I took a photo of her and she lived in my phone for the next one and half years. I used multiple applications to manipulate the colours and images around her until she no longer wanted to stay in my phone. I printed her on a photo paper. She was stuck on my wall for sometime until she needed her own wall. Using Modge Podge and gesso, she was happy with her mock-up wall where bits and pieces were added until this image came about. This work is an evolution of my journey as a student of CAT. Through those three years, each manipulation and addition that I made on her (the colours, cracks, wires, gems, gauze, etc) was either an emotional response from an activity or a symbol of self-awareness from understanding a new theory.

Multimodality is possibly the bridge that connects us all, exploring ways of making, doing and being. I look forward to the future of creative therapies – I feel that it can empower and awaken individual creativity, infusing the fabric of society with its own potential. Reaching a midlife stage in my life I have come to realise that supporting others only serves to enrich my own creative journey. Being an artist and an arts therapist opens me up wide to the magic of what it means to be human, connecting with myself and with others is such a privilege that I am grateful to have found. This work is ongoing and important, I am excited and I am ready.

Emma Fayelecaun, Momo D’Mare (discovering a possible body), 2019, digital photograph.

Sally Swain, Self-portrait as Bright Winter Hooded Lockdown Queen, gouache, acrylic, felt marker, collage, haberdashery on recycled food carton, 410×330mm.

On a bright chilly day during Sydney’s lockdown, I go walking. I wear sunnies, a green cloth mask and fur-lined hood. I feel oddly strong and free in my new disguise. Later, my intergenerational online art group chooses ‘self-portrait’ as its theme. I am impelled to depict my freshly emerged pandemic power persona, as an antidote to behind-the-scenes doubt and uncertainty. In these Covid times, what feels safe and what feels frightening? What’s hidden and what’s revealed? I consider visibility and invisibility as an artist, arts therapist and older woman in our culture. I create ‘paintage’ (paint plus collage) on a recycled food carton canvas. I show the unfinished artwork to a peer, who says it looks as if Red Riding Hood has swallowed the wolf. A bird appears on my shoulder. I hear the bird’s song and the bird hears mine.

Jo Davies, Hole, 2021, digital print, 148×210mm.

Hole is a self-portrait of part of the embodied experience of traumatic stress, created as an art object as a way of communicating what this feels like. I was reflecting on what it felt like to be trapped or stuck in a hole. I learnt ‘where the bottom is’ for me, and it was further down than I could have ever envisaged. Awareness of our felt sense is a way of understanding our implicit body wisdom and facilitates the connection with others, in the therapeutic space and life in general. The original image was made on a large piece of paper (1500×1000mm), with materials including oil and chalk pastels, watercolours, inks, oil bars, acrylic, and iron filings. This image is a smaller, manipulated digital image of that artwork, using Procreate.